Let It Go!
Is there anything that you need to let go of so that you can live the life you are meant to live? Do you have any grievances, hurt, resentment, disappointment or anger that you won’t let go? And you won’t let it go because you think that forgiving that person means that they did nothing wrong. I’m here to tell you that letting it go doesn’t absolve that person of what they did or didn’t do. Letting go is for you. When you let it go you are free of all that icky stuff that weighs down your spirit, mind and body. You don’t have to wait until New Year’s Eve or some magical time to let it go. I almost gave up my dream of traveling around the world – Dallas, Barbados, Trinidad, Australia, Philadelphia, South Africa, etc to unite black women and teach my sisters how to empower themselves. What was standing in the way of my dream? Me! I didn’t want let go of the hurt I believed black girls caused me when I was younger. In 7th grade, Emma Davis threatened to beat me up if I didn’t do her math homework. Throughout high school, black girls called me "oreo and white girl". Some attempted to beat me up because I was a geek. I was a book worm and couldn’t fight well so my younger sister had to protect me a number of times. So when I decided that I wanted to devote my time and energy to inspire black women, a block revealed itself to me. Little Tyffany reminded big Tyffany that black girls had always persecuted her. But if I wanted to serve black women, I had to let go of the hurt from almost 30 years ago. And, I did. What did I do? I tapped on the emotional pain. Tapping also known as EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) Tapping or Meridian Tapping is a simple self-help tool that is used to reduce or relieve emotional and physical pain. It’s a combination of Chinese acupressure and emotional therapy. You tap on meridian lines located on the surface of your body as you state how you feel about an experience, illness, person, etc. Tapping is used world wide to reduce or relieve stress, PTSD, help with weight loss, anxiety, physical pain and more. After tapping, I was able to process my hurt, remove the block and forgive those girls from my childhood. How long have you been holding onto your hurt, grievance, pain, etc? Maybe, it’s the ex-husband that left you for another woman or the family member who told you that you would never amount to anything. Whatever your story is, you must to let it go. Also, is it possible that you haven’t let it go because you falsely believe that holding onto the grievance, hurt, etc. benefits you? How does hanging on to your pain and hurt benefit you? I know this song and dance very well so listen up. When we hang onto all the hurt, we get to blame others and forever be the victim. That person is blamed for us not wanting to love again, not pursuing our dreams, not trusting anyone, or not living life. My hurt turned into a story about me being a victim and getting my need for attention met. Does this feel familiar? Every time I shared my story, someone would say, "I’m so sorry that happened to you." I would get some attention in the form of sympathy. The attention was the benefit and I didn’t want to let it go because I was also dealing with my issues of being unlovable, not enough and unworthy. Now that my soul is operating from a higher level of consciousness and I learned to love myself, I don’t need unhealthy attention. I need to live the life that I was meant to live and so do you. Allow me to let you in on something else I realized. The nastiness that I endured wasn’t really about me. It was about those girls. They didn’t love themselves so they took it out on me. Those girls, like the person who you’ve made a persecutor, couldn’t treat you with love if he or she didn’t love himself or herself. So are you ready to be free of the grievances, hurt, disappointment, etc. that you have been carrying around like baggage? If so, do it now. I know that it is difficult but let it go, forgive and live your life.